on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
It's an open bar. I'm gonna be gone when you get here.
Text me the address now before you're too drunk to text English.
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
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