The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize
