It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
I forgot to tell you, wear something you can puke on Saturday. We're christening this marriage with a shot of jager. NOT KIDDING.
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
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