Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
Randomize
