Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Randomize
