oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
I LinkedIn messaged people about jobs when I was blacked out
Randomize
