so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
