how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
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