Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
You FaceTimed me at three in the morning while you were peeing. Your eyes were glazed over and you showed me your bellybutton.
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
You peed on a flamingo?!?
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