I woke up with my face in a pile of pancakes and 3000 mistakes.
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
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