A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
Randomize