I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
There's a naked man in my car right now.
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
Randomize
