So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
Randomize
