There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
Randomize
