well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
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