I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
I am at a point in my life where I don't want to brush my teeth for my tinder date because toothpaste and martinis don't mix.
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
Randomize