is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
did all my christmas shopping this morning at 4am drunk. never went to sleep. i was walking home drunk last night when i passed a target and saw 3 kids having a dance off. had to join. somehow they convinced me to go shoopping with them. i bought 4 disco balls and a lava lamp.
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
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