seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
There's a dead frog in my kitchen?
Yeah, you found him outside and decided to give him a bath with your roommates electric toothbrush.
The worst part is that you sang Air Supply songs to him as you did it. Poor guy died in the middle of "Making love out of nothing at all"
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
I'm both gender and math confused
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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