Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk.
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
Randomize