Did I ever tell you that the first person i made out with cried?
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
Fun fact: You might be drunk if your vision is so blurry that you almost ask "do you know where my glasses are?" while you're wearing them.
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
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