and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
Oh thank Jesus fuck for my shitty infertile womb. Crisis averted
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
