I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
Randomize
