I'm jealous of your bromance
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
Randomize
