SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
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