I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
Randomize
