I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
I am never drinking with the goths again.
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
Randomize
