I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
I’m 95% positive I adopted a bunny last night.
You had cocktails, didn’t you?
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
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