i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Randomize
