your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
Randomize
