Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
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