Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
she told me i tasted like america
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
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