I never want to see another naked old woman again.
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
I think I deserve the nobel peace prize for discovering that one should smoke before drinking instead of drinking before smoking.
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
Randomize
