Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
I'll never forget how blunt of a wingman you were. "Excuse me, my friend wants to makeout with someone"
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
Randomize