just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
He felt like a one man threesome
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
Randomize