she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
I yelled at your uterus for you.
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
Randomize
