so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
Two words: nipple clamps
Randomize
