Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
Randomize
