Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
Now: to brush my teeth, put on my grandma slippers and earplugs, masturbate to 50 Shades and then PTFO
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
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