Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I?
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
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