that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
