Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
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