I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
Randomize
