no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
A cab driver remembered me by name, address, and ex fuck buddys nick name from a year ago. I mustve been one memorable shit show.
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
I honestly don't understand how your night went from singing a touching rendition of Africa to an angry political rant to low key trying to find a frat boy to bang to doing dishes to yoga
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
Randomize
