I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
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