Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
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