i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
Randomize
