Do you still have your period?
Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
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