My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
We need to rekindle our bromance
Lucky for you, I found your phone.....Not so lucky for you, it was in the bottom of your vomit-filled trashcan.
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize
