How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
Randomize
