But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Randomize
