Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
So much Jack, so little girl.
When I told her I was deaf and took my hearing aids out at night to sleep, she said it must be nice not having to hear drunken roommates having awkward sex late at night.
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
Randomize
