She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
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